Why Everything We Sell Ends Up on the Floor

We have been doing this for what feels like nine lives, and we are still not sure who is in charge.

The old guard prefers a loyalty program that pays in headbutts. The new guard prefers whatever is on the other side of the door.

The Short Version, Told Slowly

Our team did a careful study. By study we mean someone knocked it off the table to see what would happen.

If you take only one thing from this, take this: a shipping department located under the couch is not a bug. It is the product.

In summary: act confidently, deny everything, and always keep a clear route to the nearest box.