Holiday Hours: Whenever the Sun Moves

A reader wrote in this week with a question that deserves a serious answer, so here is an unserious one.

We asked a customer for feedback. They looked at us, blinked slowly, and left a single hair on the form.

The Short Version, Told Slowly

The old guard prefers a returns policy enforced by staring. The new guard prefers whatever is on the other side of the door.

Our team did a careful study. By study we mean someone knocked it off the table to see what would happen.

Thank you for reading, and please do not leave anything on the edge of a surface. You know why.